Egyptian cleric Safwat Higazi says ...

Starbucks is a Zionist conspiracy.

Speaking on Egypt's Al-Nas TV in January, the avuncular, grey-bearded imam issued a call for Arabs to boycott Starbucks, which operates a total of 280 coffee shops in nine Arab states, including Egypt.

"We want Starbucks to be shut down throughout the Arab world," declared Higazi.

The reason?

Well, it has to do with the Starbucks logo.

[...]

"The girl in the Starbucks logo is Queen Esther," he insisted. "This queen is Queen of the Jews."

And the crown she wears?

"This is the crown of the Kingdom of Persia. This girl you see is Esther, Queen of the Jews in Persia."

[...]

"Can you believe that in Mecca, Medina, Cairo, Damascus, Kuwait and all over the Islamic world hangs the picture of beautiful Queen Esther with a crown on her head and we buy her products?" exclaimed Higazi. "It is inconceivable."

Of course, the good cleric made sure to counsel Arabs angered by this 'revelation' not to vandalize or set fire to Starbucks stores in the Arab world -- nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more.

It must be exhausting to feel so perpetually humiliated by the world as it turns.